A sister- friend of mine recently gave me some feedback on my blog and some lovely words of encouragement. We spoke for a little while and she mentioned that she would like me to do a blog post on the element of forgiveness. Such a huge topic and something that, for our friendship, was instrumental in healing us both from past mistakes.
We had a massive falling out many years ago and to be honest i cannot even remember how or why it started, but what i do remember is the many years lost as a result of it. We both said some harsh words to each other and carried around a slight bitterness towards one another. It became an issue as we are both a part of the same circle of friends and so any social gatherings were awkward, although we were cordial we still had an obvious dislike for one another.
Clearly not a healthy environment for two adults. Looking back we were both so immature.
The truth was i guess we both felt that we were right in our own ways and instead of moving forward and confronting the issue we just buried it for a long time,
Obviously we know how Jah works (smile), and circumstances bought us to a point where we were alone and really had no other option but to clear the air. Needless to say there was alot of smiles and laughter afterwards. I think its fair to say we have not looked back since!!!! Aside from just apologising to one another, we had to genuinely forgive each other. I am so blessed to be able to be friends again with someone that i had such a great relationship before. (oh gosh im getting all emotional hahaha). I love her as more than a friend and despite our differences of opinions at times, she is a truly warm and loving person.
Forgiveness is an essential part of your growth! Both in your earthly life and your spiritual life.
Forgiveness is not just simply saying sorry, its letting go from your heart. Its asking Jah to cleanse your heart and actually show you where you are still holding ill feelings. Its not always easy because people can hurt you so so bad and you just do not even want to hear their name let alone forgive them for what they have done. We have all been there.
One thing to bear in mind is that forgiveness does not always mean that the person can or still needs to be in your life. Its not a free access pass for them to do it again or even to have that opportunity, its a form of release for YOU and enables you to move forward unburdend. Forgiveness is not something that you only grant someone once they have apologised either. Sometimes you have to forgive people regardless if they themselves are sorry or not. Leave the judgement to Jah.
I have carried resentment and bitterness in my heart for many years for certain people who will never see the error of their ways. Am i going to sit down and block my blessings, am i going to laden down my heart; or am i going to forgive the apology that i havent got and enhance my life?
I think you can guess the answer.
Do you notice how easy we can ask Jah to forgive us of our mistakes, but deny others when they ask? Or we do not even take steps to forgive them? We do something wrong and its confession time and pleading with Jah to forgive us. We cant expect to be forgiven if we cannot forgive ourselves.
I am still in a place of heart cleansing, because its not an overnight thing, it doesnt just happen and life is a bed of roses. It takes time. However the most important thing to remember is that it can happen. No matter how much a person has hurt you, betrayed you, disrespected you, you can forgive them and relase yourself from them.
Did you know that unforgiveness is a form of soul tie? ( Thats a whole other blog!!!)
If there is someone that you feel as though you cant forgive just reconsider. Take your time and i promise you it can happen. If you want to reconcile with a loved one but time has passed and forgiveness has not taken place, take the first step and let Jah and time do the rest. If we are honest, alot of the time arguments and fall outs are so trivial and occur when tempers are raised! Let your heart and mind be free. Im truly glad that i did.